Three men in a maternity ward, one English, one Scot, and one Pakistani. Nurse comes into the waiting room and says there has been a terrible clerical error and they dont have any documentation as to which of their three newborns is which. The men are all shocked but manage to gain some composure and agree that they will each go in and choose one of the babies. (This is a Joke Universe where DNA paternity tests do not exist)(and the mothers all, one assumes, in comas)
The Englishman, exhibiting his sense of entitlement, goes in first and returns with a baby which is, even to the most medically untrained eye, clearly the Pakistani baby. As the other two men stare at him in puzzlement, he says, look, one of the other two babies is a Scotsman and I am not taking any chances!