Wednesday, Dec. 28[/i]
Military Bowl Presented by Peraton: UCF vs. Duke[/b]
What is Peraton? I had a joke but it kind of reminded me of Mickey Rooney in Breakfast at Tiffanys. I am, first, docking myself points because I am ashamed that I thought of the joke, second, giving myself points for not making it and third, subtracting said points for referencing it in for you to figure out. Duke
AutoZone Liberty Bowl: Kansas vs. Arkansas
Kudos to Kansas for bowl eligibility. But the Ar makes all the difference. Arkansas
San Diego County Credit Union Holiday Bowl: Oregon vs. North Carolina
On the strength of their defense, but DEFINITELY NOT THEIR QUARTERBACK. Oregon
TaxAct Texas Bowl: Texas Tech vs. Old Mississippi
Typical Old Mississippi season. Start the year with seven straight wins then play teams that do not suck. TT has had some really mediocre QB play all year, but has still had a productive offense. And it has been a couple of years since I have been able to make a Shough of Despond joke, so I got that going for me. Texas Tech
Thursday, Dec. 29[/i]
Bad Boy Mowers Pinstripe Bowl: Syracuse vs. Minnesota
Nothing says desperate male midlife crisis like Bad Boy Mowers. Your life was a sad waste and your sole connection with your past virility comes from mowing the lawn. Welcome to your fifties, loser. [/b]Minnesota[/b]
Cheez-It Bowl: Oklahoma vs. the Florida State
Oklahoma decided to spend the year proving the Peter Principle. Welcome to mediocre. the Florida State University
Valero Alamo Bowl: Texas vs. Washington
Well, they beat us so having them finish with 11 wins makes our year slightly less pathetic. But only slightly. Pennx can be a real headache. Washington
Friday, Dec. 30[/i]
Duke's Mayo Bowl: Maryland vs. the NC State
As I say every year, the concept of a Mayo Bowl just makes me gag. Worst menu item ever. Though since it has the South Atlantic League tie in, I anticipate the year Duke gets this game. Also, is Duke Mayo a thing? Hell, mann, we do not have it out here. Per Wikipedia it contains more egg yolks than other brands and no added sugar, so there is that. Baby Tags is healthy. Devin Leary is not dead, but he will be outside looking in from the portal.Maryland
Tony the Tiger Sun Bowl: Pittsburgh vs. UCLA
This game should be Grrrreat! I think the UCLA QB is sitting this out to prepare for the draft, though why is beyond me. He is a fourth rounder, hurt or healthy. University of Pittsburgh
TaxSlayer Gator Bowl: Our Lady of the Perpetual Tie vs. Carolina***
OLotPT will by pyneing for a quarterback. The Cocks took down a couple of giants their last couple of games, after an unimpressive start to their season. University of Carolina***
Barstool Sports Arizona Bowl: Ohio vs. Wyoming
A bowl game full of stupid hot takes and rampant sexism, I guess. Again, when in doubt pick against the MAC. On the other hand, I am rather fond of the Bobcats, who are normally bottom dwellers, and were as recently as last year. Never let common sense and past experience get in the way of a good story. Ohio