The Babylon Bee nails it:
SAN DIEGO, CA—Upon hearing that San Diego teachers were providing instruction to migrant children but not American citizens, many clever parents began disguising their kids as illegal immigrants in hopes that their kids could finally see the inside of a classroom.
"OK, Aiden, remember -- if they ask you what your name is, just say, 'No hablo ingles,'" said one parent as she dropped her kid off near the Mexican border in Chula Vista. "And don't pick at your fake mustache; it'll fall off. Don't forget your poncho!"
"I packed you a burrito and some quesadillas for lunch! Love you!